room 257 - my romantic shithole

This is one of the moments that I don’t know what to do, what to be, who to search, who to want, how to wait, how to deal…
The other day I’ve seen myself asking my own shoe where should I go, it seems that for some while that I think I lost my way. I was waiting for his answer, for his direction and guidance, probably waiting for a yellow brick road to start walking on, but we stood the two quietly looking at each other, waiting for one of us to give the first step.
There we stood for days, without moving, with afraid of the world, or petrified by his size, almost like we still did not know how to walk.
After I’ve started to wonder if my foot was to big to this shoe, or was the shoe to small for my foot, no answer was found, and no sense in this question was approved.
I’ve then decided to start to walk, wishing and wanting to give a step at the time, in order to knowing at least where I came from, since where I go now, is not up to me to know in immediate, and once again I saw myself loosing to much time searching for the place that I come or the one that I go, not allowing me just to enjoy the walk, and get stronger in my legs…
I decided to run, and I fell asleep in my bed, where in my dreams I was running like I wanted, enjoying every minute of it, seeing landscapes into the smallest detail, getting also the large picture in front of me, I woke up, I was tired I could not run again, so I decided to walk instead, the legs were stronger, and there was a track to be walked, another sound track to be listened, something new to be tracked by my walking…
Fuck it, I’ve lost my track again, don’t know what to write and a bit afraid that if I put into written words, my fears, doubts, will be around for longer period…well, different fears and doubts, will join me in my life, as for everyone I guess, is just a matter of dealing with them in a better way, giving them only the right amount of importance, knowing also that they will vanish in their time, not forgetting that in the meanwhile we should enjoy the ride, and learn along the way. You walk, you fall down, you get up, you walk again…simple no?